Take a Deep Breath

Today’s post revolves around a subject I’ve been thinking about since early 2017, when I noticed much of the population separating into pro-Trump or anti-Trump factions that were becoming increasingly tribal, vitriolic and hostile. I wrote about it in the piece, Lost in the Political Wilderness, and things haven’t improved much since. Fortunately, around the same time I came across the theory of Spiral Dynamics which provided me with a useful framework through which to understand consciousness and the importance of guarding your mind and emotional state in a world that encourages fear, tribalism and anger.

Though we live in a time where more diverse information is available at our fingertips than at any other period in human history, we’re still presented with news and narratives via specific channels; whether that be an alternative media figure, a mass media outlet or a tech giant algorithm. The news and commentary that somehow gets in front of us on a daily basis shapes our view of the world just as it always has, and this in turn triggers certain emotions – joy, sadness, anger, fear, inspiration, etc. There’s space for all that in a human life, but the ones I’m most interested in for the purposes of this piece are fear and anger.

For the vast majority of us, fear and anger should not dominate everyday life, and when they do manifest, it’s important we recognize and think about it consciously. For starters, the moment you read a headline or an article that triggers anger or outrage, I suggest taking a deep breath. Then ask yourself if this is something that genuinely deserves your attention, or is it perhaps an intentional distraction of some kind. Politicians and media outlets alike tend to make a living off manipulating your emotional state so be careful what you allow these sources to do to you.

Nobody reading this has the time to be outraged about every possible thing there is to be outraged about, so I suggest being as selective as possible when providing space in your day for this sort of emotion. Many of the issues people become enraged about on a daily basis have been intentionally manufactured or put in front of them for the purpose of pitting people against one another — in other words, for dividing and conquering — or for the purpose of distraction.

Which brings me to the next point. How can you tell if you’re being manipulated in a way that isn’t good for you or society at large? For one thing, if a piece of news or information results in you being disgusted or hostile at a vast collection of other people you consider to be on the “other team” politically speaking, you’re probably being played.

Irrespective of where you stand on the ideological spectrum, most people aren’t saints or sinners, we’re just flawed but decent people trying to do the best we can. Any news or commentary that encourages you to despise a large group of other humans simply because they vote differently, or come from a distinct culture to your own is generally not doing you or anyone else any good. Any time you find yourself triggered in such a way it’s important to be as conscious as possible of what is happening and why.

Although there are certainly major issues worthy of disgust that require serious attention, we only have so much spare time each day and a limited amount of emotional energy to spend. My suggestion is to spend your days consciously and wisely, and avoid being played and manipulated. Moreover, the best thing any of us can do on a daily basis is work on ourselves. Most of our energy is best spent trying to be better, more loving, and more understanding in our everyday conversations and relationships in real life. Just as anger and outrage can be viral and result in self-fulling negative societal outcomes, kindness is likewise contagious.

We’re all here for such a brief time and most of us (myself included) don’t always guard our emotional space as carefully as we should. Fear and anger are natural human emotions, but should be dealt with consciously and with care. Next time you find yourself being triggered, take a deep breath and ask yourself if it’s worth your time and energy. If not, move on. Life’s too short.

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15 thoughts on “Take a Deep Breath”

  1. Fear and anger have played a big role in my thinking about climate change and its impact on my daughter’s future. I am not angry and fearful now, well maybe a little bit, but that change in emotional energy levels has coincided with me accepting I cannot make everything better on my own, but I can do something, a lot in fact, and start adapting ahead of what seems to be on the horizon. Once I got my head on straight and clear, I realised fast that I am actually not powerless to make changes, and I am certainly not looking for a lead from the bad people in power.

    I think that gels with the thrust of the article? But even if it isn’t exactly on message, don’t let the political circus type topics take a second of your energy, it really is not worth it. Once I got past the cooler talk stage, took stock and acted, there seems to be like a cloak of sanity that protects you from the almost insane fear/anger reaction as an observer.

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  2. Wise words. I’ll add that people generally fear what they don’t understand. Not that some fear is not a healthy response when circumstances require a quick decision but that in the longer term information and knowledge on a fear inducing subject or situation usually dispels that fear. Again anger is often a knee jerk reaction to stimuli meant to get your goat or in sympathetic reaction to others around us already displaying anger. Here calmness and sorting through information and facts before becoming emotionally charged is important as once we are emotionally charged info, facts and their value are more difficult to logically assess. All this takes practice. Recognizing when our buttons are being pushed, taking that deep breath MK writes of and then proceeding to look at all the available information is vital to our acting as mature adults

    The fear used to hype climate change is just one such clear case. Once we go all emotional it is then easy to steer us in the desired direction without our even realizing it was fear that got us motivated in the first place rather than a look at competing facts in a logical minded state and with scientific methodology.

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  3. “There must come a time in the life of any reasonable man when the only sensible course to pursue is to spit on his hands and start slitting throats.” – H L Mencken.
    As rational beings, I have always considered that controlling our emotions should be a virtue. I have always argued rationally that this should apply to love as well, and scoff at the mindless parrot phrase “love conquers all”.
    I suggest we should love, hate, fear, and trust, for a reason.

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  4. The number one thing to always try to keep in the forefront of your consciousness is that fear and anger are one in the same, and they are both spawned by our tendency towards feeling that we are important.

    We’re not important in the least. But the ironic thing is that the sooner you realize that you’re unimportant, the more power you have.

    “Self-importance is man’s greatest enemy. What weakens him is
    feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of his fellow men.
    Self-importance requires that one spend most of one’s life offended
    by something or someone.”

    – Don Juan Matus

    ..

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  5. “Bad people crave power more than good people, and are also willing to do anything to get it. So bad people are in power.
    Why is this so complicated for some people?”

    because the enablers, the staff, the henchmen, those who serve lunch to power
    and our armed forces
    are not in power
    but without them the powerful would be powerless

    this seems to bring us back to the worker owned coops
    sit down strikes
    mutiny

    as we watch puerto rico

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  6. Have to give some kudos to Michael, this isn’t an easy topic to cover because there is no “correct” way to deal with our acrimonious political climate. We don’t want people to be consumed by bitterness, nor do we want them to throw up their hands and walk away since ignoring problems does not make them go away.

    I’m of the opinion that the anger we’re seeing is actually healthy in a lot of ways. People SHOULD doubt official narratives and they can sense that something is very wrong. Unfortunately, along with that awakening come opportunists who sell easy answers and mislead people. It also encourages people to embrace wrath because screaming at others online makes people feel like they’re doing something productive, even when they’re not.

    Personally, I feel much better about the world recently. I suppose this means I’ve reached the acceptance stage. How did I do it? My journey started by reading blogs critical of Greenspan and the Fed in the early/mid 2000s. It took me around 15 years to reach this point, so how can I criticize others who started their journey much later than me? Some of these angry people will come around and some won’t, but that’s okay.

    I think people are more good than bad, but trying to “save” everyone is an exercise in futility and frustration. We all have friends and family who, while nice people, have no interest in relearning how the world works. That’s okay too, just share knowledge with those who want to hear it. We’re all individuals and there is only so much we can do, but people have persevered in hostile conditions throughout human history. It’s a balancing act, to still like people in general without getting down when individual people succumb to hatred or apathy.

    We can and probably will move on from this era, but it won’t be pretty most of the way.

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    • To some extent your comments holds water as no one can reach the mind and thoughts of anyone who doesn’t want to be reached on an issue or band of issues.

      That said I do believe that humans can agree across the board on a basic standard of conduct when in dealing with one another and the greater universe at large. This is where dialogue needs to begin as how we relate to one another will manifest as the world we live in. The non aggression principle along with rigorous self defense of that principle, when explained, seems to garner appeal with most humans, while isolating those with more base law of the jungle attitudes or those who appear as human but have no consciences at all.

      So a base set of rules as a guide to human behaviors is necessary as the moral relativism we see in operation now manifests as a world where the rules of conduct are made to order for each situation as it suits those who are author those rules. Free speech only for those who publish the authority’s opinion and total confusion regarding any other human freedoms as to whether they are suspended or not as dependent on the optics of any given situation.

  7. The entire political/social scene in America has devolved into something like a “professional wrestling” match. Neither scenario is real. They have no impact on how the the country is governed. The same people run America from behind the scenes, President after President, Congress after Congress.

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  8. Yes, I have also given much thought lately to the increasing “POLARISATION” of all subjects – for/against, yes/no, I/O, right/wrong, etc, even on complex subjects such as gender, brexit, democracy, foreign policy, and the climate !
    The binary system of computers springs to mind, but there is also the remarkable phenomenon of the virtually equal 50/50 outcome of opposing opinions arrived at.

    Reply

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